He Was Always Yours

He Was Always Yours.
     by S. D. Kilmer 

Mother Susan, how did you cope?
Did you have a smoke of rope?
That day, February 25, 1988
You could have bathed your child
   In your tears.
So infectious was your sorrow.
I began to wish for tomorrow
The child could be ours, instead.
Yours and mine.
Adoptive father and birthmother.
Only I can think like no other.
I followed your career.
So similar to my own.
A Counselor of Compassion.
Continued to wish Anthony be ours.
As the hours sifted, swayed.
Time slipped away.
My marriage went from farce to divorce.
What other direction of course?
I always hoped I might present
Our son back to you.
Facilitate the Mother and Child reunion.
But Anthony found you, I hear.
Without me.
He disowned me, and the other.
Did he say how I was as a Father?
Oh Susan.
I guess he could never have been ours.
He was always yours.

*Anthony (given name) Nathaniel (adoptive name).

**The author is both an Adoptee & an Adoptive Father.

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